Do You Really Know Your Loved Ones?

The Power of Grandma’s Stories…

My grandma lived across the street almost all the years I was growing up on Loveland Avenue in Erie, Pennsylvania. Even though grandma and I were neighbors, I decided to record her on an audiotape one day. Little did I know that this hour would change my life and, I think, hers too. 

For the first time, she told me how she teased her big sister, what it was like to play “side-center” basketball, why she liked being a teacher in a one-room schoolhouse, and how she systematically organized her home for a family of six. That day grandma became a young girl, a teenager, a new teacher, and a mother to me---so much more than my grandma.

She also told me of her grandparents and parents—people I would never have the opportunity to meet unless she introduced them to me. And then there was her real world wisdom …. “Be what you want. If you do something, do it the best you can.”

That day I saw grandma, who was 61 years older than I was, with new eyes. My family’s legacy came clearly into view. Grandma got the opportunity through my questions to recall experiences and times that hadn’t been remembered for a very long time, and I think she liked it! I never imagined the power her life story would have on both of us. It was a beautiful moment.

How Well ... (continued from p. 10)

What’s your story? What’s your loved one’s life story? I encourage you or your children to take the time, even just one hour, to record and share the things that matter to you. A new closeness and connection may result.

7 Messages in Our Life Stories…

In order to get started, we have to know what things are critically important—what our loved ones really want and need to know. When I say they need to know these things, I mean that their lives could actually be happier and filled with more meaning, connection, and hope. Here are 7 core messages that come through when you express what matters most to you. 

Message #1:  Welcome to my world. 

Message #2:  If I did it, so can you!

Message #3:  I’d like to give you some advice…

Message #4:  I’d like to introduce you to people, times, and places you’ll never know otherwise.

Message #5:  I’ve got some good stories to  tell you.

Message #6:  This is what I believe. I hope  we share these values.

Message #7:  I love you.

Quick Start Tips

for Writing Your Life Story

1. Visualize your end result. Set a deadline as to when you’d like your story finished.  This can be a strong motivator to keep you going through the process.

2. Decide what structure you want or what template of questions you’ll use (LifeBio  is one such template).

3. Find a friend or a group, if you like, with whom you can share the process. You can  be an encouragement to each other. It’s fun to share what you’ve written.

4. Pull out the photo albums. The pictures will generate so many memories. Start jotting down what stories come to mind from the photos…things you want to be sure to share in your autobiography.

5. Make a list of other favorite stories you like to tell. Call your family members and tell them that you’re writing your life story and you want to know what they want to know. Add that to your list.

6. Answer at least one question a day. After you finish writing or typing your answer(s) for that day, read the question(s) for the next day and give yourself a day to ponder. 

 Ask friends what their answers would be. By the next day, you’ll be ready to write.

7. Do the best you can…and keep going. Don’t let one question stop you. You can always skip to the next one or avoid whole topics if you wish.

____________________________

Beth Sanders is founder & president of www.LifeBio.com (1-866-LIFEBIO)

and author of the Memory Journal

(ISBN 0-9728751-1-5)